Toadstool Dicks and Soothing Show Tunes: New Book Details More Trump White House Insanity

Stephanie Grisham never held a press briefing during the nearly 10 months she served as President Trump’s press secretary, but in her new book I’ll Take Your Questions Now, she’s delivering what appears to be a pretty damn unvarnished account of her time in the White House. In it, Grisham details a president who leered at female staffers, required live show tunes to calm his nerves, and who once called Grisham to defend his penis after it had been called into question by Stormy Daniels, the porn star with whom he allegedly had an affair.

“Uh, yes sir,” Grisham writes of her reply when Trump called her while aboard Air Force One to defend the size and shape of his penis. Daniels wrote in her 2018 book that Trump’s penis was shaped like “the mushroom character in Mario Kart.”

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Perhaps even more bizarre than the call to defend his penis is the revelation that Trump’s aides designated a White House official, known as the “Music Man,” to calm the president’s nerves by playing his favorite show tunes, including “Memory” from Cats. (In all fairness, it is pretty soothing.)

Not quite so amusing is Trump’s behavior toward women. Grisham writes that the president often invited a young press aide onto Air Force One to “look at her,” and that he instructed Grisham to “keep her happy,” according to The New York Times. Grisham also writes that Trump looked her in the eye and emphatically instructed her to deny any wrongdoing with regard to E. Jean Carroll, the journalist who in 2019 accused Trump of raping her in the 1990s.

Trump bashed Grisham on Tuesday in a statement provided to the Times. “Stephanie didn’t have what it takes and that was obvious from the beginning,” the statement read. “She had big problems and we felt that she should work out those problems for herself. Now, like everyone else, she gets paid by a radical left-leaning publisher to say bad and untrue things.”

Grisham is using the book to distance herself from Trump’s actions, and writes that she never held a press briefing because she “knew that sooner or later the president would want me to tell the public something that was not true or that would make me sound like a lunatic.”

Regardless of how disgusted Grisham may have been by Trump’s actions, she spent nearly a year defending this “lunatic,” a fact that no amount of salacious gossip offered up to the media will ever change.

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