Greg Gutfeld: 'Normal' is the new word used by frustrated Democrats

Gutfeld: Thanks for noticing Joe

‘Gutfeld!’ panel questions whether Democrats know what ‘normal’ is anymore

Happy Veterans Day America. What a glorious day in a glorious country. Or as the Democratic party describes it, “hell’s racist toilet.” But, maybe after seeing their own grim handwriting on the wall, (probably in a unisex bathroom), they’re trying to change their own warped view of America.

Have you noticed a new word used by frustrated Democrats? It’s “normal.” Yes, as inflation, illegal immigration and crime spiral out of control, moderate Dems are trying to distance themselves from the idiotic rabble promoting critical race theory and 250 genders by saying we’re “normal.” Can’t blame them. 

They’re losing elections the way Kat loses hair extensions when she gets the spins, as the Biden administration destroys everything it gets its grubby hands on. Remember how everything King Midas touched turned to gold? Well, everything Joe touches turns to their parents and says, “mommy, why is this weird man’s nose in my hair?”

According to Axios, the news site – not my Greek personal trainer (you can crack walnuts on his glutes, and I have), the word “normal” is the code word used to separate some Dems from their bonkers colleagues. They want Americans to know that the activist class within their party doesn’t speak for them. Especially when they speak like this.

Kamala Harris using fake French accent about following “the plan”

That was her doing a French accent while in France – and it was harder to watch than “The View’s swimsuit special.” No wonder the White House keeps hiding her like a bust of Winston Churchill. She’s the vice president that has the administration saying “Let’s talk about Hunter Biden’s laptop.”

So they sent her to Paris, hoping she might learn something – like why deodorant is so important. But at least Jimmy Kimmel knows why people don’t like her.

Jimmy Kimmel: “Americans really aren’t happy with this vice president Kamala Harris // I think I know why Kamala’s rating are low, besides sexism and racism which are the obvious ones.” 

Well he is the expert on sexism and racism. Who can forget his pro-women work on “The Man Show?”

Video of girls on trampolines

And his progressive efforts on behalf of Blacks.

Kimmel in blackface: hello everybody out there in TV town this is Karl Malone of the Utah Jazz here to tell you about Karl Malone home state Louisiana

Yeah – he’s the last guy to call anyone racist or sexist. But that’s his penance for his own indiscretions. Smearing you, he thinks, takes the heat off him.  He’s like a s***** corporation going woke to hide their own corruption.

And he smears a ton of people, including his own party. Remember Harris dropped out of the primaries ‘cuz she polled at 3 percent. According to Kimmel – that means 97 percent of the Dems must be bigots. But maybe the Dems don’t know what normal is anymore – after denigrating it for decades.

Remember — two-parent households were normal. Now anything qualifies as parenting. Love for country was once normal, but now we replaced a pledge to our flag with a pledge to BLM. Respecting the police was once normal. Now they’re jealous of Rodney Dangerfield. Keeping violent criminals behind bars was once normal — now the norm is to set them free like an injured bird you nursed back to health.

And look, I hate normal. This is what I did this morning before I came to work.

Clip of man riding a unicycle playing a bagpipe shooting flames

But the Dems have moved the goalposts of normal into the parking lot across the street. Even Virginia Democrat Abigail Spanberger complains that Americans elected Biden “to be normal and stop the chaos.” You know – chaos – in the form of low taxes, control of our borders, record low unemployment, energy independence, revolutionary vaccines, crazy chaotic s*** like that.

Wow, Trump was so abnormal. Or what we used to call successful. But that stuff drove the elites crazy. And it was all it took to galvanize them to get rid of him with completely fabricated scandals and a secret election cabal. 

So here’s the new normal, courtesy of a crooked media. 

Various clips of Joe Biden: The best way to get something done if you uh hold near and dear to you uh, nuh that you would like to able able to uh (pause) well anyway… // (whispers) pay them more, more // I wrote the bill on the environment // I think I’m supposed to introduce somebody but I’m not sure who I’m supposed to introduce now (guys behind him laugh and he turns around and whispers “I’m Joe Biden”). I get you guys confused you know?

Unless you’re a child talking in your sleep, that’s not normal. But maybe it comes down to Joe’s definition of normal. As long as his life retains its own normalcy, who gives a crap about yours. I mean, he just discovered, under his leadership, that gas has gone up. And not just the stuff coming out of his butt.

Joe Biden, Wednesday: Did you ever think you be paying this much for a gallon of gas? In some parts of California, they’re paying for about 4 dollars and fifty cents a gallon.

Thanks for noticing Joe. Nothing gets by you except the occasional BM. But he’s good with it. Because everything is normal in his cloistered world. He still has his nap at 2 pm. Which is usually when he is being briefed about the latest national security threats. He swims nude at 4 pm, (which is odd since the public pool requires proper swimming attire.) And removes his teeth at 7 pm. Sometimes earlier if it’s custard night. And in between, he fits in destroying Afghanistan.

Then they lock him inside his room with a coloring book and a box of crayons — joe says orange and red are his favorite flavors. Tibet has more autonomy. The person in charge really has more people controlling him than Britney Spears. And yet – I don’t think I’ve seen so many things go wrong in one administration at once. 

This White House is the political equivalent of an Alec Baldwin movie set. He hates the press and innocent people suffer. Remember those people who lied to us that Joe was so moderate, and so calm. True he is so different from Trump; the same way my bikini pics are so different from Margot Robbie’s. Trump was in your face – but he was also in your reality. Joe is rarely to be found, even when he’s standing in front of you. It’s like talking to a hologram.

And so it’s dawning on the Dems  – this is not better than a president who could call on reporters all by himself. You replaced the mean tweeter with inflation, crime, Afghanistan, the migrant crisis, a loss of order in favor of divisive chaos that splits a nation in two.

I wonder what Joe has to say.

Tom Shillue as Biden: Look, I’m sick and tired talking about what’s normal, what isn’t normal. Look, I understand gas prices are not normal, but you know what else isn’t normal? OPEC—know what that stands for? Oil pec. You know the thing. You know what else isn’t normal? Covid 1972 is when I got into this business. I’ve been on this dance floor for a long time, so I know normal. You wanna know something that is not normal? I got a crappy painting I can sell you for half a million dollars. 

This article is adapted from Greg Gutfeld’s opening monologue on the November 11, 2021 edition of “Gutfeld!”

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